Alison Laichter recently endured the proverbial boss from hell.

A promising new job as a program assistant for a small, nonprofit environmental group in San Francisco soon turned ugly, as her boss constantly undermined her confidence. During one meeting, she bluntly told Ms. Laichter that an idea was no good, then proposed the same idea herself a month later. The supervisor also screamed at her and her co-workers. It was common to find employees crying in the bathroom.

"She went out of her way to make people feel horrible all the time," recalls Ms. Laichter, now 24 years old, who lasted 10 months in the job. After several part-time jobs, she is looking for a new position close to her home in Berkeley, Calif.

The toxic boss has long been a cliché of management tomes, career guides and Web sites. Whether they're screamers, door slammers or high-functioning sociopaths, such managers can badly wound careers and trample workers' self-esteem in ways that amount to psychological abuse. They also can infect entire workplaces.

But here's an equally disturbing thought: People sometimes actually prefer bad bosses and can be complicit in making them destructive. So contends a new book, "The Allure of Toxic Leaders," by Jean Lipman-Blumen, an organizational-behavior professor at Claremont Graduate University in Claremont, Calif. "It's sometimes hard to see through that smokescreen of charisma when you first encounter a boss or leader," she says.

Toxic leaders manipulate deep psychological needs in their subordinates, Ms. Lipman-Blumen finds. Because people need to feel secure or special, she says, they may overlook early signs of unethical or otherwise damaging behavior.

She also believes that people sometimes repeat unhealthy family dynamics with their bosses because they're drawn to a situation that feels familiar. Once trapped by a destructive boss, individuals frequently experience damaged self-esteem and disorientation that make escape difficult. "Certainly, a toxic leader who promises to keep you safe is absolutely addictive," she says.

Ms. Laichter says her boss initially "seemed really smart and intelligent and at the same time hip." The young woman's enthusiasm about landing a new job last year blinded her to her superior's true colors. Nowadays, she steers clear of potentially bad employment situations by bringing a list of questions about how long workers have been there, among other things. She rejects offers if she doesn't like the answers.

Other experts argue that bad bosses are so common that almost everyone will work for one someday.

"Organizations need to understand how prevalent the bad-boss phenomenon is," says Gary Lahey, co-founder of www.badbossology.com, a Web site devoted to the matter. A recent survey completed by site visitors found that 48% would fire their boss if they could, while 29% said they would have their boss assessed by a workplace psychologist.

If you become snared in the bad-boss trap, begin by assessing the situation. Ask yourself whether you may be contributing to the problem. Can you minimize it by performing your job differently? Observe how others interact with your manager. Some bad bosses have personality disorders that you won't be able to change -- but you need to figure out how much of the problem begins with them.

Some career specialists recommend talking to a boss about the offensive behavior. Be specific and approach him or her with calm and respect. "The employee should avoid presenting their case from an emotional standpoint, because when emotions run high, situations can spiral out of control," says Linda Matias, president of CareerStrides, a coaching company in Smithtown, N.Y.

Be careful about talking to co-workers about your problems with your manager. "Once they know you're in the boss's crosshairs, there's a darn good chance that those people are worried about their own careers and they're not going to protect you," Mr. Lahey says.

The human-resources department isn't always the answer. One recent study found that only 1% of workers surveyed felt the HR department was helpful in resolving their problems with a difficult boss. Even if that finding is an extreme, HR officials must investigate claims of harassment, Ms. Matias notes, so it can be difficult to keep your complaint from eventually reaching your boss.

It's helpful to keep a log of your boss's abusive behavior. Ask a good employment lawyer about your legal options -- whether or not you quit. And be respectfully assertive with your superior, as toxic bosses frequently victimize people who acquiesce easily.

Finally, enlarge your internal network by cultivating relationships with more-senior managers.

"The extent to which you have power," says Mr. Lahey, "is the extent to which a bad boss isn't going to mess with you."