Fear of rejection can be a significant inhibitor in a job search. Many job seekers become stuck, rendered immobile.

This fear rarely disappears entirely, even for the most successful professionals. While fear of rejection is self-imposed, it's real and normal. It's human nature to want to be accepted, not rejected. Hearing a company say "no" doesn't make you a loser. It's often just a phase you go through on your way to "maybe" and eventually "yes."

In a job search, rejection shouldn't be an adversary, but an ally -- especially if you're the one doing the rejecting. If you know what you want, a slew of potential opportunities won't meet your criteria.

After all, what is the main objective of a job-search campaign? Most would say to get a job. But the purpose should be to determine what you want to do and where do you want to do it. From there, you need to find as many situations as possible that meet these criteria.

Rejecting potential opportunities can be a measure of your progress. It suggests you have a clear understanding of what you want to do and where. It also can mean you know better job opportunities are on the horizon.

Too many job seekers conduct their campaigns passively. They devote too much time to responding to ads and internet postings and writing to search firms. While you need to pursue these avenues, you shouldn't always be trying to fit yourself to someone else's needs.

Ann Gootee, director of human resources' corporate services for the Quaker Oats Co., agrees. Job seekers need to know what is important to them, she says. They should know the kind of work, culture and opportunity for growth they want. Gootee says, "As a hiring manager, I'd rather have a candidate reject our employment opportunity during the interview process because it doesn't meet their needs than to accept the job and realize later that it isn't a fit. Success is about the right fit and meeting the needs of both the candidate and the employer."

Tom LaForce, managing director of human resources and operations for the Gas Research Institute, a manager of gas-industry research and development programs in Chicago, asks candidates to describe their ideal job, including the type of organization and supervisory style. "I'm continually amazed at how few people, even senior-level candidates, can do little more than recite generic statements," he says. "What it tells me is that they're ill prepared. On the other hand, the few who can articulate, with some precision, what their next job will look like impress me."

Rejection also can be okay, depending on the reason. Often, it's a matter of timing. Regardless of your qualifications and abilities, you have to be in the right place at the right time. Consider the electrical engineer who wanted to work for a battery manufacturer. She wrote to the recruiting manager. A "Thanks, but no thanks" letter soon arrived. Then she wrote to the plant manager. This time, she received no response.

The engineer learned that the battery maker would have a booth at a regional trade show. She went to the show and introduced herself to the plant manager. She received a courteous but cool reception. The plant manager wouldn't agree to a future meeting, however, she sent him her resume and maintained a correspondence.

Five months later, the engineer received an invitation to lunch and a tour from the plant manager. She's now the plant's senior production manager. She subsequently learned her interest and persistence had impressed the manager and that the previous senior production manager had quit.

If you don't receive an offer, there may be a range of reasons why. A common one involves having the right chemistry. Consider that you often must make decisions based on your gut instinct. Hiring managers have to as well. Avoid the urge to feel slighted. No one can be a perfect fit to every job. Leave yourself some margin for error.

Consider the 34-year-old financial analyst who had his sights set on a senior position with a Fortune 200 company. He had three successful interviews and a final visit with the vice president of finance that appeared to go well. Four days later, he received a rejection letter.

Was he disappointed? Yes. Bewildered? Yes. Defeated? No way. He wrote each principal expressing his positive feelings toward them, the organization and his hope they'd keep the door open for a future opportunity. He corresponded periodically to keep his name in front of them.

A year later, a competitor hired one of the principals as the vice president of finance. In need of a new controller, the vice president immediately thought of the financial analyst, who got the job and now has his eye on the position of assistant vice president of finance.

When candidates hear they didn't receive a job, they often have an immediate emotional response. While you may not have much control over your initial reaction, you have control over the feelings, thoughts and actions that follow.

One way to cope with rejection during a job hunt is to enlist a team of supporters. Charles Gurian, director of human resources at Rudnick & Wolfe, says the most successful searches are the result of a team effort, with the job seeker supported by a spouse or partner, family and close friends.

"The more people who know you're involved in a search, the more people who can provide creative ideas -- new thoughts on jobs, leads, potential employers and industries," he says. "These people can provide emotional support to help deal with the inevitable rejections that will occur. Ultimately the responsibility is the job seeker's, but the task is eased when others are available to provide emotional support."

The worst kind of rejection -- self-rejection -- often takes the form of inactivity or limited action. Avoiding rejection can become a driving force that can suspend all efforts. To succeed, you must move forward. Moving forward means you'll encounter some bumps along the way.

In a job search, you're responsible for making things happen. You can't rely on others or on luck. Success can be reduced to this simple formula: E=R. Your efforts will equal your results.

Your self-worth should be determined by an appraisal of who you are and how you live your life. Whether a company offers you a position has nothing to do with it. Review what you have to offer: your marketable skills, intelligence, problem-solving abilities, communication skills, ability to get things done, technical acumen, drive, commitment and your ability to interact effectively with people.

Your self-worth should compel you to seek out only work situations that will be fulfilling and rewarding. Reject those that aren't.